Need a title for a blog? Why not Zoidberg?: Archive

Apr 1st

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Quick Summary of the Lorax

Ted: I like chicks.
Chick: I like trees.
Ted: I'll get that bitch a tree. Bitches love trees. Hey Gramma where the fuck do I get a tree?
Gramma: Go talk to the Once-ler, he knows shit like that.
Ted: Yo Once-ler bro how the fuck do I get a tree?
Once-ler: Lemme tell you a story about trees.
Ted: Do you have to?
Once-ler: Yes. So there was this time when I had a douchebag family and then I ditched them and went off and cut down some trees to make shit with. And then this Lorax dude showed up.
Lorax: If you cut down any more trees I will cut you.
Once-ler: Yeah, yeah, whatever. Cool story bro.
Lorax: I'm sorry, by 'I will cut you' I meant I will dump you into a river and leave you to drown.
Once-ler: Woah calm thyself the fuck down bro. Jesus Christ, man. I won't cut down any more trees, happy?
Lorax: That's chill then.
Everybody: GIMME A FUCKIN THNEED I WANT ONE
Once-ler: Shit shit um hey I gotta call my douchebag family over to help.
Douchebag family: Just cut the damn trees down already you pansy.
Once-ler: Aw why the hell not. Sure thing.
Everybody: FUCKIN THNEEDS HELL YEAH
Once-ler: I'm fuckin rich this is awesome.
Lorax: What the fuck dude you promised!
Once-ler: I didn't PINKY PROMISE, douchebag, so it didn't count.
Lorax: Fuck you douchebag that's the last fuckin tree you just killed, good going. Have a goddamn tree seed, I'm out.
Douchebag family: Lol fail we're out.
Everyone: Lol I'm out man air's fuckin filthy around here.
Once-ler: What the hell do I do now. I'm just gonna lock myself up for a couple decades and not bother planting this seed thing.
Ted: So if you're not using it can I have it or what?
Once-ler: Why the hell not, man, go get that chick.
O'Hare: Woah woah everyone slow down trees will give you guys for free what I give you for 50 bucks. That's not cool man.
Ted: Nobody gives a shit, I have a fuckin tree. Move bitch, get out the way. I'm planting this fucker.
Chick: Oh, Mr. Ted, ooooh! You're so sexy, take me now! My body is ready!
Gramma: Damn straight.
Lorax: 'Bout time someone planted that damn tree. Hey Once-ler bud we're cool now, there's a tree again.
Once-ler: That's fucking awesome, man. Gimme a hug.
 End

Mar 31st

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Mar 31st

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IM FUCKING CRYING WITH LAUGHTER GO TO THIS FUCKING... →

motherfuckingfineasspussymobile: AND LISTEN TO THIS WHILE YOU’RE LOOKING HOLY FUCKINGC HRIST I AM GOING TO SHIT MY FUCKING SELF

Mar 31st

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Mar 31st

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Tomorrow is April Fool's Day.

heyfunniest: BELIEVE. NOTHING. TRUST. NO ONE. Life sometimes sucks, You need a break, Click here & Laugh!

Mar 31st

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That awesome moment when you find a friend you can... →

the-absolute-funniest-posts: Follow this blog, you will love it on your dashboard

Mar 31st

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Watch

the-absolute-funniest-posts: zombiejig: okay favorite video ever, nothing will beat this. Follow this blog, you will love it on your dashboard

Mar 31st

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When Peeta's name got called

lolsofunny: Peeta: Peeta’s brothers: The Funniest.

Mar 31st

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judgesdeepyl: oddsbodokins replied to your post: weird turren human pregnacys. oddsbodokins replied to your post: weird turren human pregnacys. god bless u internet eva NO

Mar 31st

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Homophobia: The fear that another man will treat... →

andyandme: mynameisgrey: aliapie: fathappyandcaffeinated: aatombomb: We were discussing homosexuality because of an allusion to it in the book we were reading, and several boys made comments such as, “That’s disgusting.” We got into the debate and eventually a boy admitted that he was terrified/disgusted when he was once sharing a taxi and the other male passenger made a pass at him....

Mar 31st

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Watch

ihopericksantorum: ihopericksantorum: “We know the candidate Barack Obama what he was like, the anti-war goverment nigg—the uh—…” Wow. For those of you denying that he said “n_gger,” please wake up and face reality. He has a history of saying racially provocative things. Rick Santorum is a bigot, this gaffe only further proves it. He didn’t say “negative” or “negligence” so cut the crap....

Mar 31st

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